one two three fourrrrnication!
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Randomize
