Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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