Someone shit on the floor
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Randomize