Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
party gras won. party gras always wins.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Last time i carry you out of a forest
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
