I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
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