walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
