I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
When are your genitals available?
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Randomize
