and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
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