I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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