Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
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