new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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