trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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