JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Randomize
