physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Please don't give away my fajitas
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
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