Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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