awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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