My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
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