Your tits are I can't wait for
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
