Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
