Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
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