Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(512): View more from Texas

clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.

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(706): View more from Georgia

You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over

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(704): View more from North Carolina

there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone

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(574): View more from Indiana

all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(443): View more from Maryland

You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.

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(859): View more from Kentucky

Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?

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(509): View more from Washington

I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.

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(541): View more from Oregon

YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?

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(613): View more from Ontario

How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...

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