Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
i think i scared a bird with my dick
These 19 People Are Into The Grossest Sex Fetishes
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Blood and glitter go together right?
People Weigh In On Whether It’s Okay to Bang Your Roommate
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-