what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
