Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
