Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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