Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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