Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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