So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
did i just pee glitter
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