I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize
