If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
