Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Randomize
