I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
