did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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