oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize