lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
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And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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