i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
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