I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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