I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize
