the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
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