Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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