I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
