He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
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