i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
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