He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
