I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Randomize
