thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Randomize