im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize
