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• (079): View more from

  I think we need to take a brake

  (078): View more from

  What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore

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• (949): View more from California

  i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.

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• (360): View more from Washington

  she smelled like a LAN party

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  23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories

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• (706): View more from Georgia

  Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?

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• (917): View more from New York City

  They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"

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• (623): View more from Arizona

  Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?

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• (859): View more from Kentucky

  I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?

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  These 23 Kids Have The Most Overbearing Parents Imaginable

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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers

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• (731): View more from Tennessee

  Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.

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• (702): View more from Nevada

  This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark

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• (561): View more from Florida

  Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.

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• (586): View more from Michigan

  Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.

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