She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Randomize
