you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
