He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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