I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
