SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
